So I've been thinking a lot lately about love and all that that subject covers....
Like okay here goes...we waste our times one people that hurt us...we give our hearts over and over again to people that so don't deserve it and by the time we find someone who may be worth giving our heart to we're so screwed up and jaded that there isnothing left to give really and what is left we have so guarded we can't even think about giving up!!!
We get screwed over time and time again that we get to a place where it is impossible to believe that someone one wont cheat on us or stab us in the back or drop us for absolutely NO REASON!!!
I've also come to realize tho that boys get their hearts broken also they can become jaded just like we can & I honestly can say that I never thought that way before my mind was pretty simple:
BOYS=ASS HOLES W/ HEARTS OF STEEL!!!!
But I've met this one boy who is trying desperately to show me that that's not always the case... this is the first time I've been in a relationship where I'm not the only one who has been hurt before!
My whole life I've dated arrogant ass holes that think they are the "shit" and can do whatever they want to the girl they are with because she'll just stand there and take it, they think she'll always be there because they have never had their heart truly broken!
But now I'm with someone who most definitely has felt that uniquely horrible feeling of heart ache! But the heard part is wondering if we will ever truly be whole again...how do you ever let that guard down when its right when you've done it so many times before when it was wrong? how do you learn to trust someone who maybe worth trusting but everyone you trusted before abused it? how do you heal that wound?
I do not know and all those questions are driving me crazy! I've never been the type to just sit back and let be what shall b I always try to figure things out I always want the answers but I guess this is one time where I have to just sit back and enjoy the ride!
GEEZ I guess girls what I'm trying to say is be careful of the ones you let close but be even more careful of the ones whose hearts you break...
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Thursday, December 4, 2008
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